I’ve said many times the main reason as to why I love him and what he helped me through, and I think right now if ya really wanna know i shall bullet point everything he’s done for me :) a lot of people seem interested, too.
- my Dad - I’ve never been as close with my Dad as i am with my Mum, the longest i ever went without seeing or talking to him was about five or six years. he used to hit me and my sister and could be quite violent from time to time, when i was growing up I’m sad to say that i could go for weeks without talking to my Dad and not be upset about it, feel guilty or miss him. in February 2012 we found out that my Dad has Parkinson’s disease, at that point i started feeling pretty bad about not seeing him as often as i could, he’s softened so much since my parents divorce and always gives me anything i ask for. he’s a wonderful Father and finding out that he has this condition has put a whole bunch of guilt on me. I’m making up for it now by going to visit him when i can, because if i tell him i wanna go and stay at his house for a weekend he will come and pick me up, i don’t need money for the train or anything. around the time we found out was when i started watching Phil’s videos. if i hadn’t started watching Phil’s videos, i would most likely still be avoiding seeing my Dad, because of Phil i am a lot closer with him and he got me through the depression and guilt stage of finding out about the disease.
- confidence - I was bullied a lot in school and sometimes in college that it really lowered my self-esteem and made me really shy. if anyone ever asks me to go anywhere or someone remotely interesting decides that they want to talk to me i will shy away or think “why are they talking to me? they must think i’m a huge loser” but ever since i started watching Phil’s videos i have gained so much confidence and i actually enjoy being with my friends and i try to relax and not think about the situation too much. watching Phil’s videos before i go anywhere with people these days really puts me in a better mood and makes me feel a lot more confident :)
- suicide and depression - when i first found out about Phil, it was a pretty low point of my life, i was extremely depressed and just feeling like not being here anymore was the only way that i could escape. a friend of mine on facebook was like “oh you should watch AmazingPhil’s videos on YouTube, i think he’d really be able to help you” and that night i watched his videos for hours. it was about three weeks after i found out about my Dad, too, so it was good timing. and Phil saved my life that night and gradually the depression slowly went away and he replaced it with happiness ^_^
- general bad days - if i ever just have a bad day in general, the first thing i will do as soon as i get home is make a cup of tea and just watch Phil’s videos for hours, he really knows how to make me feel better.
- present day - a lot of you know by now that i’m not well at the moment (I haven’t heard anything from the Doctor’s yet but i will let you know) and i feel like i’m starting to get depressed again and it’s not good but Phil is really helping me like he has done in the past and he’s just a really big inspiration to me and he’s my hero :) I wouldn’t be here without him and i can’t wait until April (or whenever my Dad takes me) to meet Phil and tell him all of this stuff in person <3 I’m nervous to meet him but i will bring him haribo and wait outside radio 1 for as long as it takes to have a chat and get pictures with him!
so, to sum up: Phil has made me a more confident person, helped me to kick my depression, saved my life, makes me feel better on bad days, is helping me feel better and a little bit less scared about whatever the heck is wrong with me and stopping me from feeling too depressed, and has bought me and my Dad a lot closer together. that is a pretty amazing person right there, if you ask me!
thank you for thinking i am lying, but i wouldn’t lie about something like this. Phil has truly got me through the worst parts of my early adult years <3